Whether you believe in celebrating it as a holiday or not, Valentine’s Day can be a difficult time for divorcees or those going through a separation. As divorce attorneys, we know the emotional toll the process takes on all parties involved. The bombardment of advertisements and products geared toward relationships can stir up unpleasant memories.
Experiencing a Valentine’s Day does not have to be a traumatic experience. Here are some of the best tips and key things to avoid to help you through the day. By planning ahead, it is possible you can make it a great, memorable day.
Use Your Support System
Hopefully you already know who in your family and friend group you can trust to talk to about emotional and personal issues. Focus on people who are supportive, understanding and non-judgmental to help talk you through your issues. Also know that there is nothing wrong with seeking professional help. Even if you choose not to call a therapist, spending time with a good self-help book can be very beneficial.
Rather than remembering gifts from past Valentine’s Days or looking through all the holiday-themed merchandise, use the day to do something great for yourself. Enjoy your favorite foods, visit the spa, get a massage or even just spend the evening watching great movies. If you have children, make the day all about them by doing activities or special projects.
Focus on Others
Another great way to change the focus of Valentine’s Day is to use it as reason to buy gifts and surprise friends and family. The gesture will be very meaningful, and you will feel great focusing on helping others rather than expecting gifts of your own.
Things to Avoid
It is important to remember that above all, it is a good time to focus on your own healing. If you are not on great speaking terms with your ex, resist the urge to contact them. It may be helpful as well to avoid spots in public where you will see a lot of couples. Lastly, if you are trying to date again, planning a first or second date could cause a lot of unexpected stress and pressure around this holiday.
These tips are hopefully helpful, not only for Valentine’s Day, but in general as you go through the healing process. Divorce attorneys in Grand Rapids have experience helping serve people in all types of situations that lead to a separation. They know that healing takes time. Thankfully, we live in an area with plenty to do, so planning a great day for yourself should be a breeze!